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Danh ngôn của Les Dawson (Sứ mệnh: 4)

I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own.
I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, six should be enough.'
Marriage is an institution and that's where a couple finish up.
Mind you, I've always been musical... Mother used to sit me on her knee and I'd whisper, 'Mummy, Mummy, sing me a lullaby do,' and she'd say: 'Certainly my angel, my wee bundle of happiness, hold my beer while I fetch me banjo.'
In awe, I watched the waxing moon ride across the zenith of the heavens like an ambered chariot towards the ebony void of infinite space wherein the tethered belts of Jupiter and Mars hang, for ever festooned in their orbital majesty. And as I looked at all this I thought... I must put a roof on this toilet.
The mother-in-law came round last week. It was absolutely pouring down. So I opened the door and I saw her there and I said, 'Mother, don't just stand there in the rain. Go home.'
The way prices are rising, the good old days are last week.
I know my name will always be linked with women.
The mother-in-law is the centre of a family.
My mother-in-law said, 'One day I will dance on your grave.' I said 'I hope you do; I will be buried at sea.'
My mother-in-law has come round to our house at Christmas seven years running. This year we're having a change. We're going to let her in.
I've got a friend who is a lion tamer. He used to be a school teacher till he lost his nerve.
When I was a child, I had wax in my ears. Dad didn't take me to the doctor, he used me as a night light.